CONFIDENTIAL/URGENT POLITICAL PROPOSAL

CONFIDENTIAL/URGENT POLITICAL PROPOSAL

Dear Sir

First we must solicit your confidence in this issue. This is by virtue as being utterly confidential and "top secret".

We are SENATOR HILLARY CLINTON, the wife of the former United States head of state, PRESIDENT BILL CLINTON, and also SENATOR JOHN MCCAIN, friend and associate of current head of state PRESIDENT GEORGE W BUSH. We got your contact through business inquiries as we were searching for contacts of a citizen who can help save our and our family's political careers since our country has been frustrating us.

We are top officials of the United States Senate Government who are interested in importation of oil into our country with funds that are presently trapped in the FEDERAL TRANSPORTATION TRUST FUND dedicated to improving transportation. We wish to send this money to overseas accounts in the MIDDLE EAST but cannot due to restrictions in Congress Transportation Equity Act requiring that this money must be spent to build roads, bridges and high speed trains.  

If you accept we will deliver to your a sum of 30 DOLLARS in the summer 2008 in form of a "GAS TAX HOLIDAY". You will then deliver this money to accounts of our friends in Middle East by taking it to your nearby gasoline station where they have information to forward the money. Please supply your bank account, social security number, address and your vote in DEMOCRATIC PRIMARIES AND NOVEMBER GENERAL ELECTION.

But bear in mind that this transaction requires absolute confidentiality. Do not visit HTTP://WWW.GASTAXSCAM.COM where there is information about dangers of our proposal and a petition to stop us from this diversion of funds.

PLEASE NOTIFY US URGENTLY OF YOUR ACCEPTANCE OF THIS PROPOSAL

Awaiting your rapid response

Yours truly

SENATORS HILLARY CLINTON AND JOHN MCCAIN

PS.  We are asking of you to pass this on via the web page known as DIGG.  For every 'Digg' that is clicked we will pass to you the sum of FIVE Dollars.

•  heh n/t

  by zeke7237 on Mon May 05, 2008 at 10:58:44 AM PDT

  •  links broken, btw

    other than the main page ...

    by zeke7237 on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:00:43 AM PDT

    •  I digg this post

      Or, "dugged" as it were.

      by Troutfishing on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:10:15 AM PDT

      •  thank you!

        I will be sending to you the cash sum of FIVE DOLLARS!  Please send to me your bank acount #, Social Security identification, and a working credit card.

        by Matt Stoller on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:12:35 AM PDT

        •  Ouch, Matt...

          That's gonna leave a mark.

          by Casey Morris on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:14:24 AM PDT

          •  2 days ago Matt said Obama doesn't care

            about us. This turnabout is most interesting and entertaining.

            Welcome aboard, Matt.

            by FishOutofWater on Mon May 05, 2008 at 04:25:31 PM PDT

            •  not changed

              He doesn't.  But he's right on the gas tax.

              by Matt Stoller on Mon May 05, 2008 at 04:54:18 PM PDT

              •  sooooooo disappointed in you Matt!

                I remember when you came to CT to help the Ned Lamont campaign and never would I have expected you to support Hillary who is so entrenched from the top down.  Ned Lamont is one of Obama's biggest supporters and was able to help deliver a win for Obama in CT.  At least he didn't give in to his principles and support the establishment!  Remember when we were so mad at the "Democratic establishment" for supporting Lieberman after the primary....now you’re doing the same thing, siding with the establishment...what gives with that!!!!

                Hillary hasn't just lied about the "gas tax" Matt... She's lied about almost everything... so much she's become pathological.

                by hws on Mon May 05, 2008 at 07:51:27 PM PDT

                •  Matt's an Obama supporter.

                  Just not an uncritical one.

                  by martianchronic on Tue May 06, 2008 at 07:22:51 AM PDT

          •  Not from Troutfishing's bank account, it won't.

            by pastordan on Mon May 05, 2008 at 07:06:30 PM PDT

        •  The link is broken!

          should be:

          http://gastaxscam.com/

          take out the www.

          Hope everyone signs this!

          by futurebird on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:29:02 AM PDT

        •  You think I big mugu?

          I wouldn't fall for such a transparently bogus scheme!

          by Malacandra on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:32:07 AM PDT

          •  uh, some questions

            probably shouldn't be asked in public.

            /snark

            by alizard on Mon May 05, 2008 at 02:37:50 PM PDT

        •  Hey Matt!

          I worked with you on the Corzine campaign in 2005!

          by Pragmaticus on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:36:18 AM PDT

        •  O'Neill, lotto cumbersome delicto megahump?

          oops, you bad, shouldn't have opened!

          by nailbender on Mon May 05, 2008 at 12:00:58 PM PDT

        •  Signed & Rec'd

          Gotta love it. Best snark ever, includes a call to action! Peace

          by ZZZzzz on Mon May 05, 2008 at 01:22:42 PM PDT

        •  Mr. Stoller, choice snark!

          Bravo! You get a Gas Tax Poster pimp for that ;-)

          {And a bonus Feed Obama Staffers Food Bomb pimp too...]

          
          [photo: Eric Brandt ©2007-some rights reserved]

          8.5"x11" flyer versions here:
          High-res PDF (3M)
          Lo-res JPG (643K)

          Please help pass this around if you can if you are as disgusted as I was when I made this... thanks.

          [Your forbearance with me spreading this around as much as possible is appreciated. I feel as if my sanity is at stake ;-)]

          by highacidity on Mon May 05, 2008 at 02:25:41 PM PDT

        •  I tried but your PayPal Account seems to

          have been compromised.  If you will give me your home address, SSN, and bank account number attached to this PayPal Account, I can just do a bank transfer to you of the $30 or else one 50 lb bag of rice, whichever you prefer.

          I have to figure out how to get the rice into the check slot on this ATM.

          by captainlaser on Mon May 05, 2008 at 07:28:26 PM PDT

        •  LOL

          This is really great.  Thank you.  I PASS THIS ON URGENT AND MUST TOP SECRET URGENT!

          by Lava20 on Mon May 05, 2008 at 08:11:59 PM PDT

        •  don't you have hit pieces to write?

          amazing. Stoller comes onto a 90% pro Obama blog as if he doesn't stink from all the trash he's written about the candidate. Simply Google Stoller and Obama and see what bubbles up.

          by Kmodi on Mon May 05, 2008 at 08:32:29 PM PDT

    •  Fixed

      It should be stable now. Thanks.

      by dbalpert on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:18:44 AM PDT

      •  link is not working! take out the www, part nt

        by futurebird on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:26:32 AM PDT

  •  What's Next?

    Bill Clinton Penis Extender^TM

    by Dems2004 on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:01:48 AM PDT

    •  Hey can we knock off

      with the right-wing talking points?  I know folks are peeved about the spousal campaign and all, but still. Sex in the oval office is the least of my worries.  

      by lgmcp on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:11:02 AM PDT

      •  That's why it's funny!

        Besides, I don't think it's a right-wing talking point when it happened; in reality land.

        by nomes on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:21:14 AM PDT

        •  'Happened in reality' isn't mutually exclusive

          with adverse-to-our-goals talking point.  For instance, on our side of the aisle, we like to make much of the "Mission Accomplished" photop. But I doubt those looking to elect more Republicans care to quote it very often.  

          And which real event is really more important?

          by lgmcp on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:29:28 AM PDT

          •  Which one caused a President to be impeached?

            That will tell you which one was more important.  It can't be over lieing, since both did that.

            by ColoTim on Mon May 05, 2008 at 02:02:49 PM PDT

            •  Well of course in the gospel of the gonads

              anything below the waist is what God and Man should REALLY care about.  All that stuff about giving your goods to the poor and all, wasn't important  And since we're a "Christian" nation, if your pastor says it's important, 'nuff said.

              by lgmcp on Mon May 05, 2008 at 02:12:39 PM PDT

            •  Nonsense. One was impeached and the other not

              because Republicans controlled Congress in one case and had near-control in the other, and because current Republicans are much less principled than those during Nixon's time, when Republicans helped impeach the president once they saw the country was being seriously harmed.

              The dominance of hypocritically pseudo-moralistic Republicans caused "Monica" to be treated as more important than a war that has killed hundreds of thousands of people. That doesn't mean it was.

              by Fiona West on Mon May 05, 2008 at 06:58:27 PM PDT

              •  I'll put /snark tag in

                next time.

                by ColoTim on Tue May 06, 2008 at 12:18:06 AM PDT

                •  Oops. Sorry. I'm usually not so dense.

                  Probably I just needed to pop out a mini rant about the dominance of hypocritically pseudo-moralistic Republicans.  :D

                  by Fiona West on Tue May 06, 2008 at 08:36:06 AM PDT

      •  Oh, I don't know...

        Forgive me if this is in poor taste, but I find strangely pleasing the idea of Barack and Michelle getting it on in the oval office.  What better way to banish all those Clinton/Bush ghosts?    

        by azure on Mon May 05, 2008 at 03:39:36 PM PDT

        •  I was just thinking yesterday

          it's been a long time since the whitehouse saw some genuinely happy love action - might clear out some cobwebs :)

          by AussieJo on Mon May 05, 2008 at 04:24:48 PM PDT

      •  I agree. This campaign is brutal.

        But Bill did a great job.  I supported him, and despite his gaffes, he was a great president.  He is in a tough spot..Hillary deserves his full support but is obviously loosing this battle.  He must be in her corner.  If she looses (make that be when), he can go back to being the elder statesman that looks out for the sick, poor and underpriviledged.

        My support for Obama is unwavering and it does not negate my support for Bill.  

        Guess that will get me flamed and relegated to the troll box.  

        So be it.

        by bloomer 101 on Mon May 05, 2008 at 03:45:24 PM PDT

        •  There's hotheads on the loose

          and they make more than their share of noise.  But let's hope that cooler heads outnumber them, and will prevail.

          by lgmcp on Mon May 05, 2008 at 05:32:14 PM PDT

    •  Sure, why not?

      The Republicans have been extending it for over twelve years already.

      Sorry, couldn't resist.

      by Omir the Storyteller on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:12:31 AM PDT

    •  Bill's next business venture

      Late night infomercials.

      by MingPicket on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:36:13 AM PDT

      •  as in

        "YOU can become a fundraiser for The Clinton Foundation." (background - swimming pool next to mansion covered with bikini-clad women)

        by alizard on Mon May 05, 2008 at 02:39:43 PM PDT

        •  =)

          by Lava20 on Mon May 05, 2008 at 08:15:10 PM PDT

      •  Used Cars?

        by elwior on Mon May 05, 2008 at 03:05:57 PM PDT

        •  Oh goody.

          A new "Speed Felon" of "Mighty Misdemeanor Motors."

          www.youtube.com/watch?v=gGkVHnIwfZA

          by WiddieDawg on Mon May 05, 2008 at 04:38:12 PM PDT

      •  "The Bill Clinton Big Mac Machine"...

        ...George Foreman, eat your heart out.

        by Spunkmeyer on Mon May 05, 2008 at 04:56:30 PM PDT

      •  BILLY MAYS HERE FOR BILL CLINTON.

        ACT RIGHT NOW AND WE'LL DOUBLE THE OFFER. NOT ONLY DO YOU GET ONE BILL CLINTON AUTOBIOGRAPHY, WE'LL THROW IN A SECOND COPY FOR FREE.

        by edg on Mon May 05, 2008 at 06:54:51 PM PDT

•  Clearly,

  from the Nigerian style this must be a dirty trick by Obama.

  by accumbens on Mon May 05, 2008 at 10:58:57 AM PDT

  •  Nigeria, Kenya, whassadiff? nt

    by C S McCrum on Mon May 05, 2008 at 12:55:23 PM PDT

•  Hillary-ous !!! n/t

  by Lisa Lockwood on Mon May 05, 2008 at 10:59:36 AM PDT

•  brilliant

  but where's the part where you try to convince me that you need my ssn as part of the application process?

  by EF in NY on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:00:15 AM PDT

  •  good point

    by Matt Stoller on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:00:58 AM PDT

    •  funny work Matt Stoller thanks for the laugh n/t

      by HoundDog on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:01:40 AM PDT

    •  YA SRSLY

      Hilarious!

      by Oregon Bear on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:06:05 AM PDT

    •  Oh, that-

      is damn funny!

      Now I will think of Hillary every time I get one of those silly e-mails!

      Nice work-

      by Red no more on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:06:08 AM PDT

      •  Damn, you mean I'm not the only one

        getting those emails? I thought I was so very special for being selected.

        by TexDem on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:11:00 AM PDT

        •  But you ARE special

          along with 5 billion other people...

          by mmacdDE on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:56:03 AM PDT

        •  My brother was special too!!

          He had some fun with one of them-

          

          by paddykraska on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:57:51 AM PDT

    •  no need to update your post

      that demand usually comes up in the 2nd 419er e-mail anyway.

      by alizard on Mon May 05, 2008 at 02:40:58 PM PDT

  •  Oh, they have your SSN#.

    What they want to know is which mattress you're keeping your life savings in these days.

    by histopresto on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:10:01 AM PDT

  •  Well, of course they need it

    as protection against voter fraud. In these troubled times, we can't be too careful, you know.

    by Nowhere Man on Mon May 05, 2008 at 12:06:01 PM PDT

•  The filters must be down. n/t

  by boran2 on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:00:36 AM PDT

  •  All kinds of filters seem to be on the fritz.

    Why, I keep thinking that a Democratic nominee for president is using right-wing frames to paint the Democratic-led Senate as elitist and out of touch with working voters.

    by kath25 on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:09:43 AM PDT

    •  That can't be!

      Why that's... that's kooky talk!

      by writerswrite on Mon May 05, 2008 at 02:02:57 PM PDT

•  perfect. too bad the gas tax is going to work

  with the uneducated.  She is channeling the republican party line...all taxes are bad.

  my slogan...

  Lets drown the road system like the I-35 bridge in Minneapolis.  Your bridge could be next.

  by jalapeno on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:01:05 AM PDT

  •  The Gas Tax 'Holiday' Costs Lives

    I want to hear that around.

    "The Gas Tax 'Holiday' Costs Lives"

    by nomes on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:24:29 AM PDT

    •  "How many 'dead soldiers' per gallon?"

      Bumper sticker I'd like to see on suv's and applied to the gas tax scam.

      by Lisa Lockwood on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:34:36 AM PDT

•  Did God give you my email address?

  I hate it when he does that.

  by Sam Wise Gingy on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:01:08 AM PDT

•  h/t

  by Matt Stoller on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:01:14 AM PDT

  •  please fix the link!

    http://gastaxscam.com/

    there is no "www" in the URL. It's a cute site and the folks who made it should get some his from this post being on the rec list.

    by futurebird on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:32:36 AM PDT

    •  It works both ways, no?

      It should work with or without www. Are you having problems?

      - The one who made the site

      by dbalpert on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:39:48 AM PDT

  •  FINALLY! A snark diary that worked! tipd/recd nt

    by ILean Left on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:38:48 AM PDT

•  Awesome

  Very well done.

  This is the kind of blog activism we've been needing.

  by eugene on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:01:19 AM PDT

  •  Good to see you

    here lately, eugene.

    Everything going ok?

    by Dems2004 on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:03:55 AM PDT

•  Let me give you my bank account numbers

  and the most powerful position in the USG to make it happen.  It's almost too good to be true!  FREE MONEY!

  by Inland on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:01:23 AM PDT

  •  it will only be free

    If everyone sends us to the Digg!  

    by Matt Stoller on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:14:17 AM PDT

    •  Dugg like a mofo!

      Thanks for this -- it's spot-frickin-ON.

      by Phoenix Woman on Mon May 05, 2008 at 12:14:18 PM PDT

•  Well played.

  If you accept we will deliver to your a sum of 30 DOLLARS in the summer 2008 in form of a "GAS TAX HOLIDAY".

  ahaha

  by differance on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:02:21 AM PDT

  •  Yes, that $30 was the perfect touch. n/t

    by JBL55 on Mon May 05, 2008 at 12:21:48 PM PDT

    •  It's not fair.

      I used the gas tax savings calculator and found that mine only came to $18.82. How come I don't get the full 30 bucks? Aren't I blue-white-collar enough?

      by edg on Mon May 05, 2008 at 06:59:28 PM PDT

•  Even funnier,

  In light of the fact that I just got one of those emails this morning from one of my Nigerian "friends".  Sorta like getting a mailer from the HRC campaign.

  by Nancy in LA on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:02:50 AM PDT

  •  Almost exactly like HRC emails!

    Considering they're both full of lies to get my money.

    by NM Ward Chair on Mon May 05, 2008 at 06:24:52 PM PDT

•  Love your humour

  All that's missing is the "we're contacting you because you're such a good Christian."  I always get that line in my Nigerian scam e-mails.  Apparently the folks in Nigeria don't know me.  

  by martydd on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:05:02 AM PDT

  •  They don't know my

    naked pagan balefire-jumping ass, either.

    by NM Ward Chair on Mon May 05, 2008 at 06:25:32 PM PDT

•  As we say in the old country,

  snarkissimo!

  Slickly played! Unctuously tipped & recommended! ;)

  by Uncle Cosmo on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:05:15 AM PDT

•  You really need to run this

  through babblefish and back again to give it that authentic English-as-a-third-or-fourth-language sound.

  by CJB on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:06:51 AM PDT

  •  hahaha

    good suggestion

    by Stand Strong on Mon May 05, 2008 at 12:07:30 PM PDT

•  Sweet.

  I'd also like some cheap Cialis please, McClinton.

  by chumley on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:07:16 AM PDT

  •  Where is the v1agr@ and Genuine Rolekx watches??

    by rwsab on Mon May 05, 2008 at 04:08:03 PM PDT

•  Clever

  much better then most of the heavy-handed bullshit snark people usually post as "humor".

  But you need more more spelling mistakes or less verbs... or both.

  by Wisper on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:07:20 AM PDT

•  Magnificent.

  Truly. This may be the highlight of my day.

  by kath25 on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:07:42 AM PDT

•  Sorry

  My money is still "invested" in a pyramid scam. But this does sound interesting..

  by allmost liberal european on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:10:30 AM PDT

  •  do not fall for scams!

    This is not like the other emails you may receive.  This is a real live MONEY-MAKING CHANCE FOR YOU.

    thank you

    by Matt Stoller on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:15:17 AM PDT

    •  no,

      thank you

      by Stand Strong on Mon May 05, 2008 at 12:08:03 PM PDT

•  Touché

  Well done, Stoller.

  by rubyji on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:14:24 AM PDT

•  Can I get $30 for every family member

  and friend I sign up to vote for the Republicans you name in your email?  I am easily bought, please let me know ASAP, and I will send you my bank account number!!!! 11!!! 1!! 11!!

  by Prof Dave on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:15:48 AM PDT

•  I'm emailing this around.

  :)

  by nomes on Mon May 05, 2008 at 11:19:53 AM PDT

  •  Yep

    I mailed it around generously - gotta share this windfall opportunity.

    by AussieJo on Mon May 05, 2008 at 04:28:12 PM PDT

•  I usually respond to similar pleas . . .

  But something about this doesn't seem right.

  by raatz on